Within the last few years, I have noticed quite an increase in books or sites that promise to show guys how to pick up good-looking women. Known within the industry as pick-up artists, the people who study these skills go to bars, clubs, and other venues to utilize their new-found skills to seduce women. The industry is bigger than you might think, with many websites, forums, and online training packages available for people who are interested in this sort of thing.
The question is, should you invest in such books or training? Out of curiosity, I did some research on resources used by pick-up artists, and my feeling is that it’s not worth it to try to learn these skills. The jury is out on how well the methods work, but to me, that is not the point.
The one thing in common among sites that promote pick up methods is that the emphasis is on what works. By following the tips, you essentially become a robot who uses lines that work or in some cases even make up bogus stories to try to make yourself seem more appealing. Every relationship expert will tell you that communication and honesty are important in a romantic relationship. By studying these methods, you are doing the direct opposite by essentially turning yourself into a phony person who is not true to himself.
Instead of trying to mold yourself into someone else, why not just be yourself and look for someone who likes you the way you are? Join an online dating site like Match.com, you will find there are hundreds of singles in your area, and with such a large number of people, you are bound to find someone who just naturally clicks with you. Best of all online dating does not cost that much money. Joining a dating site only costs you about $20 – $30 a month, and even less if you take advantage of special promotional offers from Match.com.
So my advice is, ditch the pick-up methods taught by websites and books, and instead focus on putting yourself out there so you have a chance to meet someone who genuinely likes you, not who you are pretending to be. Some great sites to start out with are Match.com and eHarmony. Speed dating is another great way to meet a lot of people in a short period of time.